Sunday, May 20, 2012

Memories Returned

It’s pretty much come back. I’ve pieced together the puzzle.

I was bullied when I lived in Florida.
A lot.
I guess it kind of comes from going to small private school and sticking with the same people for years on end. They know how to prey off of you and know how to push your buttons. My weakness are easy to exploit. So many of them made my life miserable.

I hated them.

Our school itself was located next to this ridiculously large forest. In hindsight, this was very poor planning because the area it was in was rather rough and there were always hints that there were hobos were living deep in there. Of course as a kid I didn’t care too much because well, I think with most kids the mindset was “forest=giant playground”. I honestly never really noticed. I tend to be oblivious to subtle things. I only found this out when I heard my mom (who worked there as kindergarten teacher’s aide) talking about it.

There was slightly weird vibe that I started feeling when I got to the 4th Grade, there was just something that felt…off. Every so often I always thought I saw something out of the side of my eye but of course if I turned around nothing was there. Every so often, a kid would leave in the middle of the year and normally we were told that the parents took them out. It seemed reasonable but from that time on it seemed to happened more frequently. And the ones that left, to my knowledge, never mentioned that this was going to happen and they simply be replaced a week later. This wasn’t narrowed down to my grade specifically, it was spread out among Pre-K through 8th Grade. But I never put too much focus on it.
For a couple of months at recess, we played kickball but that wasn’t what most of us cared about. The kickball field was next to the massive forest and if the ball wound up in the woods the P.E. teacher sent us out to get it. Yeah, it wasn’t exactly the most responsible thing to do as a teacher. But of course, so many of us would intentionally try to kick the ball over the fence for a chance to romp through the mud and explore this mysterious place. I would sometime use it as excuse so I can isolate myself when I was overwhelmed.

One day, He found me.


I just looked in awe at this incredibly tall, nicely dressed, faceless thing staring down at me.  

I…I heard a voice in my head.

I sense your pain child. Your suffering. Your sorrow. Your hatred. I can help you. I can make sure they never make you hurt again.

“You know who they are? You know about me?”

I’ve been watching you for a long time. Would you like me to help you?

“What do you mean watching me?”

I know you have been bullied. Kicked around and made fun of. Nobody seems to care about you. Am I right?


I can help you. Make sure those bullies don’t hurt you anymore. You would like that wouldn’t you? 

“I don’t know….” I quickly ran off, my ‘don’t talk to strangers’ instinct kicking in.

So be it….but I’ll always be waiting here if you change your mind…

A week or so had passed and there is one day when for a Social Studies project I turned in a model of a massive fort. I spent hours grueling over this thing, my OCD side kicking in and wanting to make sure that every little detail was accurate. I made sure the color and texture were right to match the pictures, the little soldiers inside looked accurate along with the weaponry. The gate opened and closed, the cannons moved up and down. This thing was a fucking masterpiece. I was so proud of it.

Well after coming back from recess on the day we were suppose to present them, mine went missing. I looked all around for it until I finally found it in the bathroom, smashed to pieces, stuffed in the toilet, and covered in shit and piss. I broke down. The bullies…the culprits walked in and laughed with sadistic glee, making fun of me for crying, saying that my fort was crap to begin with. I snapped and grabbed the head of one of them and smashed it into the wall. Needless to say the other guys jumped me and beat the shit of me before dragging me and dunking my head in the toilet with my project. A teacher came in and broke it up. The guys got detention for a couple of days, I got off because well after going through all of the shit I went through, they’d have to be pricks to do so. Also it helped that my mom worked there. Christ, I was lucky nothing get infected.

But that was my breaking point.

Next day, I made sure to go out into woods, where we met last. And there He was, waiting for me.  

Would you like me to help you? the voice in my head said.


What would you like me to do?

“Anything. Just…whatever you can do to make them suffer.”

Are you sure? There could be a price to pay.

“I don’t care! Make them cry!”

So be it.

Somehow it felt like the whole plan formed in my head. I knew I shouldn’t trust him. I mean why should anyone trust a faceless guy in the woods. But I was desperate. I wanted this to end and I wanted them to pay. I didn’t know what he would do but…I just wanted it to stop.

A couple of days later, the plan went into action as all of the bullies went after the ball that was kicked over the fence. The objective was to get them to a clearing and The Tall Man would handle the rest.

“Hey guys! I found the ball!”

“What are you talking about?” said the first of the bullies Caleb. He was a follower, too scrawny and meek to do anything physically so he relied on insults instead. “We didn’t even kick it that way!”

“Well it must have rolled over here because I found it.”

He showed up a minute later “Alright gaytard, where is it?”

“It’s up there in the tree.” I pointed out the ball, stuck firmly in some branches courtesy of Slendy “I think we are going to need more people to get it down.”

After trying to climb, Caleb took my advice. “Fine. Guys! The ball is over here! We got to get it down!”

As soon as that statement finished, it began.

A large tentacle swung from the side and whacked off Caleb’s head with such a force that it was like a golf ball being hit off of a tee and the tall man was now accompanied by dozens of tentacles behind him. Two others, Andrew and Lucas, showed up just as Caleb’s head bounced off of a tree and rolled along the ground. They were frozen in horror and couldn’t react when He turned to them. A tentacle wrapped around each of their ankles. Lucas was swung around like a ragdoll and smashed against multiple trees until he was a bloody pulp. Another tentacle went to Andrew, who dangling upside down above Slender Man and was whimpering in fear. The tentacle slowly slashed downward from crotch to skull, making him open up like his body was hinged. The inside of him rained down but were all caught as The Tall One…well I’d rather not talk about that. Just know that they never they never hit the ground. The bloody pulp that was Lucas and the husk that was Andrew were carelessly tossed away and were caught in clusters of tree branches.

Arnold was the next to show. He was a rather heavy fellow, but he, by no means wasn’t out of shape. He packed one hell of a punch. He didn’t have long to react but tried to waddle away before he was impaled by a tentacle and tossed aside. His blood rained down on me as his body flew by, turning my school uniform shirt from white to red.

The thing was, when this all happened. I felt nothing. There were no feelings of guilt for leading them to their deaths, no fear for the abomination from hell that was causing chaos, and yet there was no joy from the punishment that was being dealt to them.

Then there was Patrick, the leader of the bullies, who showed up soon after Arnold was dealt with. I turned to look at him as he uttered “What the fuck?” No sooner did those words come from his mouth that Slender Man turned to him. Patrick pissed himself at the sight of the faceless being.

So this is the one… the voice that filled my head said.

It felt like time slowed down as I watched several tentacles shoot out and wrap around Patrick’s ankles and wrists. I watched as his limbs were stretched to what seemed like the point where they would have been ripped out if there was any more effort made, shouts of pain erupting from him. Several more tentacles came and the tips penetrated various points on his body. The poor kid was choking up blood begging for his mom. The tentacles retracted and he hit the ground with a thud. He struggled to make his way to me, managing to grab onto the cuff of my sock. “P-please…help me.” he begged between his chokes of blood that came out of his mouth. I looked down at him. I’m really not sure what my response would have been. I didn’t have time to do anything. Patrick was grabbed by the tentacles and I heard the crunching of bones as multiple tentacles crushed most of his limbs and ribs. He screamed in pain and was finally silenced when he was ripped opened. The look on his face as the last bits of life left was one of shock and horror, someone who just seemed unable to comprehend the concept of death. Someone… it was the face of a child.

Time felt like it returned to normal as his body was tossed into the trees. Then things changed. David showed up. He wasn’t one of the bullies. He must’ve heard the scream. This wasn’t supposed to happen. It was just suppose to be the bullies. No, this was wrong. All wrong. His tentacles wrapped around David, completely enveloping him. They all tightened around him, crushing him and wringing him out like a sponge before throwing his corpse aside. 

The rest of them showed up. The remaining 8 victims. Tyler, Colton, Matt, James, Steven, Katie, Jenny, and Holly. The first three were of the bullying group but the others… Katie had her head and all of her limbs ripped off. Tyler was bisected.

 I wanted to say something. Make Him stop. But nothing came out.

Matt and James were skewered by the same tentacle. Colton was hacked to bits. Steven was sliced in the half from below the ribs. Jenny thrown against a tree as multiple tentacles slammed down at once, crushing her under the weight and leaving her a splattered mess against the tree.    

The tentacles made their way towards Holly

I’m sorry, I have to take a break from this. This is really overwhelm.

I’m a fucking monster. 


  1. Agreed, hell, god knows I would've done the same thing if I had the chance, some days it's just so tempting to just go back to Glen Burnie and gank all the people that gave me hell....

    I'm glad you're back and pretty coherent now though.

    And by the way, if I ever meet you an am loving the ever-living crap outta you. No one should have to go through ANY of that.

    You're not a monster, because if you're a monster than so are all of us.... And I refuse to believe that.

  2. Thanks to both of you, it's just...Christ I can't believe I would do something like that. I need a little time to piece the aftermath of all of this together.

    @Tori It's pretty good be coherent again at least as coherent as someone who is borderline starving can be.